Did you know that Israel provoked Muslims to crash airplanes into the Twin Towers on 9/11 and to blow up the London Underground?
No? That's weird, because Lady Jenny Tong says it's true. Lady Tong is described in The Jerusalem Post as "a lifelong anti-Israel activist."
She says, "I feel sorry for the people of Israel sometimes. Their government's policies have made that country the cause of a lot of the world's problems, yet now they are seen in the middle as the remedy and the base for the West to fight back."
Lady Tong is a top Liberal Democrat in the U.K. with a lifetime appointment in the House of Lords, so she has to know what she is talking about.
Let's see...Israel declared its independence from Britain in 1948, the same year Jordan, India, and Pakistan declared their own independence from the British Empire.
Yet nobody seems to blame those fine countries for terrorist killings in Gaza or Kashmir or Mumbai. Or the assassination of Pakistani President Benazir Bhutto in 2007.
But the Israelis made the Muslims really mad by seizing Jerusalem from the Religion of Peace in 1948 or 1968, something like that.
Whatever. This is all so last century.
Well, actually, radical Muslims invaded Spain in the year 711, killing merrily as they went along. They were really, really mad even then, because Europe was full of infidels, and Allah told them the Christians had to surrender to the Faithful or it's off with their heads. All that is in the Quran, and that's the infallible word of Allah, by way of Mohammed's dream diaries.
Boy, were those radical Muslims ever angry back in 711. You should have heard the imams stirring them up in their Friday sermons.
So it's only logical that Israel time-traveled back 1,250 years and got the Berbers so mad that they all invaded Spain from North Africa.
Plus, around the same time, millions of Muslims head-chopped their way all over Arabia, Mesopotamia, Egypt, Persia, the Byzantine Empire, Afghanistan, and half of India.
This was all on the way to knocking over mostly Christian Spain and creating the fabled land of Andalus, a realm of peace and love and justice and tolerance.
You can read all about the peace-loving Saracens in The Song of Roland from back in the 12th century.
Oh, that was when they invaded France, I guess. Well, France is close enough to Spain. I think.
Boy, those Muslims were really, really mad, all because of what Israel did to them in 1948.
Do you get the feeling that Ms. Tong's grasp of world history is a trifle foggy?
This Lady is a lifelong senior member of the Liberal Democratic Party. She is the crème de la crème of Britain's parliamentary elite. But she is hardly the only one to blame Israel for the sins of 1,400 years of Islamic aggression and imperialism. In her circle of friends, it's all the rage. Literally. Nobody bothers to disagree.
This just shows you the standard of intellect that now prevails all over in London town. The whole European culture has gone the way of Global Warming. Get the suckers to fall for that and they will fall for anything. And they do.
Think of Lady Tong as Britain's Nancy Pelosi: San Francisco Airhead Sisterhood, London branch, just had a little too much Botox injected last month. That stuff spreads, you know. It doesn't just stay where you inject it. Botulinim toxin -- you get it from germs, the stuff that causes food poisoning. Botox can kill you, but first it rots your brains.
Botox explains a lot of what we hear from the international Left. Does George Soros get Botox treatments before he smokes Mary Jane?
In Ms. Tong's mind, those wicked Israelis made the radical Muslims upset by occupying Jerusalem, which truly belonged to the Muslims because Mohammed rose on his flying horse Buraq from the Mosque of Omar when he died.
...in 1948. Or something.
That story is not exactly in the Quran, but it's an honest-to-gosh tradition. Everybody knows it, and it gives a billion Muslims the right to occupy Jerusalem and kick out all the Catholics, the Coptic Christians, the Bulgarian Orthodox, and the Armenians, and also to tear down the Second Temple built there in the 5th century BC. And obviously toss out a million Israelis who think they live there. Lady Tong has been saying it all her life.
Because ethnic cleansing is okay in some places. Not in the Balkans, where Bill Clinton started bombing because the Europeans were so upset by ethnic cleansing in former Yugoslavia. But the Middle East is a different place.
Israelis are imperialist swine. Not the Jews, of course, because Lady Tong can't be an anti-Semite. No, she just hates Israelis. Not the Jews. Don't forget that, because all the trouble started in 1948 when Israel declared its independence. Or maybe 1968.
Whatever you believe, Muslims certainly were peaceful before Israel made them mad. That's why they are called the Religion of Peace. "Islam" means "peace," they say. Well, okay, it means "peace after you surrender" to Allah's nearest official representative on earth. Or lose your head.
Any lefty airhead will tell you that the Israelis really made the Muslims mad, and it's all about Western Imperialism.
So there. Obama really hates Western Imperialism, too. That's why he bows to His Royal Highness, King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia, the Protector of the Holy Cities of Islam.
Lady Tong is socialist Britain's version of Queen Victoria, who refused to sign a parliamentary law against lesbian sex because she couldn't believe such a thing existed.
Today, Obama would just send her some DVDs to show her how it's done. That's why he gave that iPod with his own speeches to the queen. (The one in Buckingham Palace.)
Lady's Tong's ignorance is not zero. It is less than zero, just as Queen Victoria's ignorance of lesbian sex was not just an absence of knowledge. This kind ignorance takes a lot of hard work. It is a willful act of selective ignorance.
You really have to work hard to unlearn this much history.
Like gay sex for Victoria, Israel and Islam exist in deliberately excavated holes in the mind of the Left. It's the same memory hole where they keep the United States of America. Israel and America are just imperialistic, hegemonic pig powers -- not like the enlightened rulers of China, Vietnam, and the old Soviet Union. Read Thomas Friedman in the New York Times, and that's what you find out. Know your enemy.
Vast, selective, and malignant ignorance is now a major British export. The global warming fraud was, if not invented, at least whipped up and fed with combustible materials by formerly respectable scientific institutions in Britain, such as the Royal Society. The BBC sells its selective and blind ideology to the New York Times like carbon credits. The Left simply takes what doesn't exist, makes the suckers feel guilty about breathing out CO2, makes up a sin tax for it, and sells the rights to sin at a nice profit to the Americans. That's how the Chicago Carbon Exchange was supposed to work before the investors figured out the scam.
This also exactly how Green jobs work, and Green cars, and Green sin credits. You sell Green delusions for a trillion Greenbacks.
Ms. Tong just has a Green brain. It's full of open Green spaces, like the Chicago Carbon Exchange. If Al Gore is selling it, she's buying.
Apparently under the new British educational system, Lady Tong has never heard of the Prophet Mohammed (PBUH!), who lived in the Arabian desert in the sixth century. Mohammed was a famous genocider, killer, desert pirate, serial rapist, and a proud child molester. That was some time before Israel declared its independence in 1948, but the Jews made him mad even then, because the Quraisha tribe refused to convert to Muhammad's new religion. So he killed six to nine hundred of them and sold the women and children into slavery. After the usual, I suppose. Lady Tong would understand.
In her mind, Mohammed was just the holy founder of the Religion of Peace, and Israel is to blame for the folks who blew up the London Underground in 2007. And the Twin Towers in 2001.
Listen: Jenny Tong has lifetime tenure in the House of Lords, paid for by the British taxpayer. She is beloved by all right-thinking Liberal Democrats. She's got to be doing something right.
Just tell her not to swallow any more Botox, please.